Things I Never Told You Read online

  PRAISE FOR BETH K. VOGT

  “Beth Vogt has long been a favorite for romance, but she finds her true niche with her first women’s fiction entry, Things I Never Told You. Engaging, sympathetic, and almost painfully honest, this story of buried family secrets and hidden trauma will stay with you long after the last page is turned. I’m impatiently awaiting the other titles in this series.”

  CARLA LAUREANO, AUTHOR OF FIVE DAYS IN SKYE AND THE SATURDAY NIGHT SUPPER CLUB

  “Questions, regrets, and memories hang over all our lives. Things I Never Told You authentically explores past and present hurts in a way that will take readers deeper into the heart. Beth’s story will give real hope to anyone struggling with fractured relationships.”

  CHRIS FABRY, CHRISTY AWARD–WINNING AUTHOR OF DOGWOOD AND THE PROMISE OF JESSE WOODS

  “Talented author Beth Vogt brings her storytelling to a new level in this women’s fiction debut by tackling the messiness and beautiful bond of families in Things I Never Told You. Told through the voices of sisters, Vogt uses a clever twist in this tale of love and forgiveness. Readers will savor this one.”

  RACHEL HAUCK, NEW YORK TIMES BESTSELLING AUTHOR

  “Once again Vogt’s beautiful writing captures the struggles and hopes of her broken characters, this time with a cast of sisters who find themselves forced to confront their pasts, their fears, and the healing power of forgiveness. Powerful, moving, and redemptive. Everything I hope for in a Beth Vogt novel.”

  SUSAN MAY WARREN, USA TODAY BESTSELLING, CHRISTY AWARD–WINNING AUTHOR

  “Earnest. Emotional. Hope-filled and complex . . . With the characteristic depth and heart readers have come to expect from a Beth Vogt novel, Things I Never Told You marks the author’s memorable entry into contemporary women’s fiction. Whether sister, mother, daughter, or friend . . . each will find shades of herself in this redemption story. It is a must-read, must-share novel!”

  KRISTY CAMBRON, BESTSELLING AUTHOR OF THE LOST CASTLE AND HIDDEN MASTERPIECE SERIES

  “Things I Never Told You is a poignant, emotionally moving story that pulled me in from the opening chapter. Compelling threads of past hurts and present fears, long-kept secrets and complex family dynamics, kept me turning pages. Beth Vogt’s latest book, complete with a soul-stirring faith journey, is one that will stick with you long after the end.”

  MELISSA TAGG, AUTHOR OF THE WALKER FAMILY SERIES AND THE ENCHANTED CHRISTMAS COLLECTION

  “Beth Vogt is one of those authors who legitimizes the depth of story hidden in dramas not unlike our own. In Things I Never Told You, she tugs the reader through the pages as a child might plead, ‘Come and see.’ Before the book’s end, the characters have become the reader’s extended family, their pain and joys our own. Another story well-told.”

  CYNTHIA RUCHTI, AUTHOR OF A FRAGILE HOPE AND AS MY PARENTS AGE

  “In Things I Never Told You, Beth K. Vogt deftly explores family dynamics, the push and pull between sisters, the pain of loss, the journey of grief, the beauty of forgiveness, and so much more. I rejoiced and wept with these characters and was sorry to let them go when I reached the end. Highly recommended!”

  ROBIN LEE HATCHER, RITA AND CHRISTY AWARD–WINNING AUTHOR

  “This beautifully told story tugged me into the lives of three sisters separated by tragedy and time. The book is a beautiful tale of redemption and hope in the midst of darkness and fear. It is filled with characters that will stick with you long after you read the final line.”

  CARA PUTMAN, AWARD-WINNING AUTHOR OF SHADOWED BY GRACE AND IMPERFECT JUSTICE

  “Rich with spiritual truths, emotionally compelling and endearing characters, Things I Never Told You peels back layers of the soul, exposing the dangers of secrets kept, and the freedom found when light shines through the darkness as the truth is told. A beautiful reading experience not to be missed.”

  CATHERINE WEST, AUTHOR OF THE MEMORY OF YOU

  “Beth Vogt has an ability to draw her readers more deeply into a story, revealing secrets only when necessary, and never tell all until the end. Women’s fiction at its finest.”

  HANNAH ALEXANDER, AUTHOR OF THE WEDDING KISS AND THE HALLOWED HALLS SERIES

  “A book this good is a double-edged sword. It’s a wonderful reading experience and the ultimate frustration because it’s over far too soon. Beth Vogt is truly one of the great ones. She’s established herself as a consummate storyteller and a grand master of her craft.”

  EDIE MELSON, DIRECTOR OF THE BLUE RIDGE MOUNTAINS CHRISTIAN WRITERS CONFERENCE

  Visit Tyndale online at www.tyndale.com.

  Visit Beth K. Vogt’s website at www.bethvogt.com.

  TYNDALE and Tyndale’s quill logo are registered trademarks of Tyndale House Publishers, Inc.

  Things I Never Told You

  Copyright © 2018 by Beth K. Vogt. All rights reserved.

  Cover photograph of woman copyright © by Westend61/Getty Images. All rights reserved.

  Designed by Julie Chen

  Edited by Sarah Mason Rische

  Published in association with the literary agency of Books & Such Literary Management, 52 Mission Circle, Suite 122, PMB 170, Santa Rosa, CA 95409.

  Things I Never Told You is a work of fiction. Where real people, events, establishments, organizations, or locales appear, they are used fictitiously. All other elements of the novel are drawn from the author’s imagination.

  For information about special discounts for bulk purchases, please contact Tyndale House Publishers at [email protected], or call 1-800-323-9400.

  Library of Congress Cataloging-in-Publication Data

  Names: Vogt, Beth K., author.

  Title: Things I never told you / Beth K. Vogt.

  Description: Carol Stream, Illinois : Tyndale House Publishers, Inc., [2018] | “Thatcher Sisters.”

  Identifiers: LCCN 2017049669| ISBN 9781496427236 (hardcover) | ISBN 9781496427243 (softcover)

  Subjects: LCSH: Family secrets—Fiction. | Sisters--Fiction. | Domestic fiction.

  Classification: LCC PS3622.O362 T48 2018 | DDC 813/.6—dc23 LC record available at https://lccn.loc.gov/2017049669

  ISBN 978-1-4964-2726-7 (ePub); ISBN 978-1-4964-2725-0 (Kindle); ISBN 978-1-4964-2727-4 (Apple)

  Build: 2018-02-22 15:53:16 EPUB 3.0.1

  To my daughters, Katie Beth, Amy, and Christa:

  You define sisters beautifully. And for that, I am thankful.

  Contents

  Chapter 1

  Chapter 2

  Chapter 3

  Chapter 4

  Chapter 5

  Chapter 6

  Chapter 7

  Chapter 8

  Chapter 9

  Chapter 10

  Chapter 11

  Chapter 12

  Chapter 13

  Chapter 14

  Chapter 15

  Chapter 16

  Chapter 17

  Chapter 18

  Chapter 19

  Chapter 20

  Chapter 21

  Chapter 22

  Chapter 23

  Chapter 24

  Chapter 25

  Chapter 26

  Chapter 27

  Chapter 28

  Chapter 29

  Chapter 30

  Chapter 31

  Chapter 32

  Chapter 33

  Chapter 34

  Acknowledgments

  About the Author

  Discussion Questions

  1

  THE WHAT-IFS TAUNTED ME every time I visited my parents, but any hope of beginning again had vanished years ago—if there’d ever been one.

  What would have happened if my parents had gone through with selling the house in Colorado Springs my sisters and I had grown up in? I
f they’d labeled and taped up all the boxes—the clothes, the books, the dishes, the photographs, the awards, and the trophies—and unpacked them in a different house?

  A change of location. A chance to start over.

  But unexpected loss held my parents captive.

  For the most part, our family seemed unchanged. The kitchen clock—a porcelain plate decorated with bright red-and-yellow flowers but lacking any numerals to designate the passing of time—hung in the same place it had since a dozen Mother’s Days ago. The same white wooden shutters hid the bay windows in the breakfast nook. The same worn round table in the middle, surrounded by four chairs adorned with nondescript blue cushions our mother changed out every few years—whenever Johanna reminded her to do so.

  I pushed the Start button on the once-new dishwasher. My parents had installed it at the Realtor’s recommendation when they’d planned to move into the larger house that offered a coveted view of Pikes Peak.

  Time to focus on the cheesecakes—the engagement party dessert finale. The hum of the dishwasher blended with garbled conversation as the door between the kitchen and dining room opened, the sound of Jillian’s fiancé’s booming laughter sneaking in. Geoff and his corny jokes.

  “Just getting the dessert, Kim—”

  “I’m not your timekeeper, little sister.” Johanna’s no-nonsense voice interrupted my concentration.

  I stiffened, gripping the handles of the fridge. Why hadn’t I posted a Do Not Enter sign on the door? Maybe I should have caved to Nash’s insistence to attend the party, even though tonight was more work than play for me. Why not have my boyfriend act as bouncer outside the kitchen? Flex his muscles and run interference?

  I had no time for my oldest sister. Any minute now, Kimberlee would return from setting up the silver carafes of coffee and hot water for tea, along with cream, sugar, spoons, and other necessities. She’d expect the trio of cheesecakes to be arranged on their individual stands—my job tonight, since we’d only had the caterers deliver the food for such a small gathering.

  “Do you need something, Johanna?” I pulled the first cheesecake from the fridge, my mouth watering at the thought of key lime and dollops of whipped cream. Being the party planner for tonight meant I’d had no chance to indulge in the hors d’oeuvres or cocktails, despite this being my other sister’s engagement party. And vegan or not, I could appreciate a decadent dessert—and postpone interacting with Johanna.

  “You and Kimberlee are pretty good at this event-planning business.” Johanna leaned against the kitchen counter.

  “Mom and Jillian seem happy. That’s the important thing.” I settled the cheesecake on its stand, the plastic wrap clinging to my fingers as I uncovered it. “It’s all about finding out what people want and then making it happen.”

  “Festivities is making enough to pay the bills, apparently.”

  “Yes.”

  Not that I was going to produce an Excel spreadsheet of our accounts payable and receivable for my oldest sister.

  “You two didn’t charge Mom and Dad full price—”

  “Really, Johanna?” Not sparing my sister a glance, I shoved the fridge door closed with my hip, a turtle cheesecake balanced in my hands.

  “Oh, don’t get in a huff, Payton. Honestly, how do you manage your customers if you’re so touchy?”

  And this . . . this was yet another reason why I didn’t come home unless absolutely necessary. I concentrated on transporting the second cheesecake from the fridge to the island, refusing to square off with my sister. Best to change the subject and prep the desserts.

  “Jillian and Geoff seem perfect for one another, don’t they?”

  Johanna took the bait. “Of course they do. They enjoy the same foods. The same movies. He makes her laugh. They’re content with a typical version of happily ever after.”

  And now my question had set Johanna’s sights on Jillian. Should I ignore the unspoken criticism or not? “You don’t approve of Geoff?”

  “I wouldn’t marry him. They remind me of that old nursery rhyme. ‘Jack Sprat could eat no fat, his wife could eat no lean . . .’”

  “And I suppose one of the reasons you’re marrying Beckett is because you make such a good-looking couple?”

  “You’ve got to admit he’s easy on the eyes.”

  Easy on the eyes? Who said stuff like that anymore? “Not that he’s around very often for anyone to get a look at him.”

  “If I don’t mind being in a long-distance relationship, I don’t see why you should be so critical.” Johanna’s stilettos tapped a sharp staccato on the wood floor, her platinum-blonde hair caught up in a tight ponytail that swished down between her shoulder blades.

  “I’m not criticizing. Just mentioning that Beckett plays the role of the Invisible Man quite well.”

  “You’re almost as funny as Geoff.” Ice frosted Johanna’s words.

  Time to change the subject again unless I wanted a full-blown argument with one sister during my other sister’s party. Not that I could think of a topic Johanna and I agreed on. “Isn’t it odd? You and Beckett have been engaged for over two years now. Shouldn’t we be planning your wedding so Jillian and Geoff don’t beat you two down the aisle?”

  “It’s not a race. Beckett’s stationed in Wyoming and I don’t want to give up my job to move there—”

  “Did I know Beckett was in Wyoming?”

  “Honestly, Payton, he’s been there for a year.” Johanna sniffed. “But then, it’s not like we chat every other day, is it? You and Pepper were the close ones—”

  Heat flushed my neck. My face. “There’s no need to bring Pepper into the conversation, is there?”

  “Why, after all this time, are you still so sensitive about talking about her?”

  “I’m not sensitive. I just don’t see why you had to mention Pepper when we were talking about you and Beckett—”

  The sound of voices rose once again as the kitchen door opened. Poor Kimberlee. She didn’t know she’d have to assume Jillian’s usual position as the neutral zone between Johanna and me.

  “Have you seen Jillian?”

  Not Kimberlee. Mom, who was also an expert human buffer.

  “Isn’t she with Geoff?” I removed the cling wrap from the cheesecake.

  “She was a few moments ago, but now I can’t find her.” Mom circled the island as if she expected to find her middle daughter crouching down hiding from her. “Isn’t it almost time for dessert? And aren’t we supposed to open gifts after that? They certainly received a lot of presents, didn’t they?”

  “Yes. It’s a great turnout.” If only the kitchen didn’t feel like a revolving three-ring circus. How would Johanna like it if our family showed up at the hospital pharmacy where she was in charge?

  Before I could say anything else, Kimberlee, the one person I’d been waiting for, joined the crowd. “Are we all set in here, Payton?”

  “Just about.” I swallowed back the words “if people would stay out of my kitchen.” This wasn’t my kitchen. And family or not, Mom was a client, at least for tonight, and needed to be treated like one. And I’d been dealing with Johanna for years. If I wanted tonight to be a success, the less said, the better.

  “Mom, why don’t you and Johanna join the guests?” I removed the classic cheesecake from the fridge. “I’ll find Jillian while Kimberlee makes the announcement about dessert and Jillian and Geoff opening their gifts.”

  As Johanna and Mom left, I faced my business partner, shook my head, and sighed. “Family. And before that, a longtime family friend wandered in, asking for the crab dip recipe.”

  “It comes with working for relatives.” Kimberlee took the cheesecake from me, the eclectic assortment of rings on her fingers sparkling under the kitchen lights. “But honestly, everything has gone beautifully. There’s hardly any food left.”

  “That’s because I know how to plan portions.”

  “It’s because we know how to throw a good party.”

  “Well,
let’s keep things going and get this dessert set up.”

  Once the trio of cheesecakes was arranged on the table in my parents’ dining room, I nodded to Kimberlee. “I’ve got to go find our bride-to-be.”

  “No problem. I can handle this.” Kimberlee smoothed a wrinkle from the white tablecloth and repositioned the vase filled with bright-red poppies, my mother’s favorite flowers.

  “It’s not like she wandered far. She’s probably in the bathroom touching up her makeup.”

  Not that Jillian was a “refresh her makeup” kind of gal. Mascara and a little bit of basic eyeliner was her usual routine. Lipstick was reserved for fancier affairs. She’d probably be cajoled by the photographer into wearing some on her wedding day.

  The upstairs bathroom was empty, lit only by the flickering flame of a cinnamon-scented candle. Where could Jillian be? A thin band of light shone out from beneath the door of Johanna and Jillian’s former bedroom at the far end of the darkened hallway. Why would my sister be in there? As I moved past my old bedroom, my fingertips brushed the doorknob for a second. I pulled my hand away, balling my fingers into a fist.

  I paused outside the bedroom and then rapped my knuckles against the door. “Jillian?”

  Nothing . . . and then, “Payton? Do you need me for something?”

  Just for her party. I eased the door open, stepping inside. “What are you doing up here? It’s time to open your gifts.”

  What had once been Johanna and Jillian’s room was now a generic guest room. At the moment, the only light came from the slender glass lamp on the bedside table. My sisters’ beds had been replaced by a single larger bed covered in a gray-and-white paisley comforter. An idyllic outdoor scene adorned the wall across from the dark oak dresser.

  Jillian, who’d been hunched over on the corner of the bed, straightened her shoulders. “I, um, got a phone call and decided to take it in here away from all the noise.”

  “Is everything okay?”

  “Yes. Absolutely.” Jillian’s smile seemed to wobble for the briefest second. “Did you need me for something?”

  “Your engagement party? It’s time to dismantle that Jenga tower of gifts in the family room.” I shook my head. “Tsk. And after all the hard work I put in arranging it.”